Sharing Time

So, I've never been particularly good at sharing. Well, that's not true, I am very good at sharing things that are easy to share, but when it comes to the deeper things I'd rather just leave them be. After reading my good friend's blog where she catalogs her life and is incredibly translucent about her medical conditions I have decided to share what has been going on in my life recently.

Recently might not be the best term either considering I've had this on and off since I was 17 but it's currently "on" so it is current in that sense. Since February I have been having chest pain, it's a fairly normal occurrence for me so I've never been particularly concerned, but I decided to try seeing a doctor again since I gave up on them previously (2006 and 2008). These 'episodes' as I like to call them vary in length and can be anywhere from 30 seconds to 90 minutes. The pain is fairly intense and has on occasion left me feeling rather crippled. In my previous times seeing doctors they have run batteries of tests with no solid results. I to this day have no solid explanation for what happens to me. The main problem being that none of them have been able to induce or record an episode - which means they have no idea what's happening when I'm actually having one, all they can see is how my body is acting normally.

The latest doctor did an EKG, chest ex-ray, chest echo, and finally (last Tuesday) a stress test. Still nothing. In the midst of the disappointment of having no results I am at least happy that they are so far unable to detect any serious defects with my heart or lungs. I've heard many opinions: angina, anxiety, arrhythmia, pleurisy, etc. And I'm just about to my giving up on the doctors point once again. Unfortunately they seem to have been increasing in intensity, frequency, and length so I'm not sure if giving up and living with it is currently a proper option.

That's the gist of it.

With that being said I know that God is faithful, and that He works all things for the good of those who love Him, I know that I can trust Him above all things, and I know that whatever happens is for the good of His kingdom. I serve the great, mighty, all-powerful God and He loves little old me, faults and all. That is what is truly amazing.

My favorite verse at the moment, which I have nearly memorized just from my shear desire to share it with the world is:
"I am God, and there is no other; I am God and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done, saying, 'My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose.'" Isaiah 46:9-10
How can anyone question the sovereignty of God after reading those words? I most certainly cannot.

The adorable twins I nanny for turned 1 last Thursday! Oh, and I learned the greatest lesson in child photography - JUST KEEP CLICKING!

How Long?

As Christians I feel like we are frequently asking the question how long. How long must wait? How long must I pray? How long must I endure this hardship or suffering? In all honesty, I know that I feel more secure when I know how long something will last. The pounding pain of a headache it tolerable if I know it will only last 30 minutes until my tylenol kicks in. But that's not the way God works; that's not the way the world works. In reality we are always left wondering why or how long - but it is this wondering that strengthens our faith in God. If we already knew when everything was going to happen how could we have faith and depend fully on God to see us through?

Have you ever noticed that God has a funny was of bringing everything together at once? Just after starting the first paragraph of this blog post I began to read Elisabeth Elliot's "The Mark of a Man." which states (on the second page of the introduction): "Faith has to be exercised in the midst of ordinary, down-to-earth living. Ordinary living includes trouble. When things are going as we would like, faith doesn't often seem necessary. It's when things get messed up that we look around for answers or for help."

Perhaps if we, as people, focused less on the time and more on the what we wouldn't worry as much about that which we cannot control. By focusing on the "what" I simply mean to pay more attention to what is happening to us - yes I am enduring this hardship, but look at the wonderful things God is doing in my life through it. Or if you are still too deep in to see the silver lining, then at least remember that God said He works all things for the good of those who love Him. So if you love God, He is working everything out for your good - not your happiness, but your good, and trust me in the long run is much better since happiness is a mere fleeting feeling that changes with the wind.

Better late then never - 4th of July fireworks:

Garden My Heart

     I have a dream. It may not be as inspirational and amazing as Mr. King's, but it is a dream nonetheless. My dream is to have this amazing (and useful) garden. I'm not one of those people who just wants tons and tons of pretty flowers, I want all of my fruits, veggies, and herbs. Don't get me wrong, I like flowers in their place: such as lining a walk or framing an entryway, but my dream garden (so far in my mind) doesn't have any.
     Imagine walking down the road and lining the fence next to you are marvelously enticing fruit trees of every kind: apple, pear, pomegranate, fig, peach, plum, lemon, mango, orange (I could keep listing but you might get bored). These trees are big, full, and heavy laden with their sweet offerings. So you decide to turn down the driveway to see more and you notice that what you couldn't see from outside is that under the large fruit trees by the fence there are also bushes (blueberry, blackberry, strawberry) likewise possessing copious amounts of their wares. You also find that the drive is lined by trellises overgrown by grapes so big and juicy you wonder how they are hanging on to the vine. Back behind the house (just outside the kitchen door) is the garden containing every aromatic herb you could imagine, in carefully sectioned plots. At the end of the herbs you reach the vegetable (and other planted fruits) garden with lettuces, green beans, watermelon, cucumber, squashes, zucchini and onions, etc. Plus throughout the yard are scattered almond and pecan trees already covering the ground in their tasty nuts.
     Well, my dream might need some work, but that's the gist of it. This week I started my first ever trial run for my dream garden - I bought a Meyer lemon tree, a pomegranate tree and I planted some watermelon seeds. I'm excited to see if my thumb is green like my dad's or brown like my mom's. Though to be fair to my mom she also recently purchased a few lemon trees, so we'll see how those turn out too.

To coincide with the theme of gardening I thought I would share the parable of the sower:
     "A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. Still other seed fell upon good soil, where it produced a crop - a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown."
      "Listen then to what the parable of the sower means: When anyone hears the message about the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. This is the seed sown along the path. The one who received the seed that fell on rocky places is the man who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. But since he has no root, he lasts only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, he quickly falls away. The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful. But the one who received the seed that fell on good soil is the man who hears the word and understands it. He produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty, or thirty times what was sown."
Matthew 13:4-8, 18-23

We are the harvesters of plants, but God is the harvester of man. May he find the fruits of our lives a favorable offering for His kingdom.

Photos of the Day:

On an exercise note, I recently started running someone's dog (Indy) so my frequency and pace is beginning to pick up, plus my motivation for getting out of bed! My best time, which was Monday, is 34:50 for 3 miles. I'm hoping that as I continue running- three miles gets easier and easier and eventually I can pick up the miles and the pace, but for now I'm comfortable with what Indy drags out of me.

Back to Basics

Hello dear friend, it has been a while, shall we be re-acquainted? First let me say WOW, it has been an entire month since I've been on here - busy bee wasn't even close. So this past weekend my boyfriend and I drove to Austin to surprise our moms for mother's day (both of our families live there) and while we were on the 6 hour total commute I started talking about my blog and how I have been so busy, but more than that I just didn't know what to say. In a sheer stroke of genius he said if I'm so busy shouldn't I have plenty to write about, and he is of course right. So here we go - in no particular order. 


First my dear friend had her first child, a boy named Brad, and I had the joy of taking his newborn pictures (a first for me). He is such a precious boy and an incredible joy to shoot even though he didn't want to sleep at all.

I also had my birthday - to celebrate my roommates and I threw a tacky prom birthday party - complete with a photo booth to remember and re-live every tacky outfit. I had so much fun I'm definitely considering making this an annual event! (Oh and since it was my birthday I was crowned prom queen - a fun first for me!)

So in the spirit of "back to basics" I want to share just a simple biblical truth with you now too.

"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life." John 3:16

I know we've all heard it hundreds of times, you probably even have it memorized, but do you ever just mull over it? I mean really take the time to sit down and think about that truth? God loves us so very much that he gave his Son to die for us. Jesus died for us. God sent him to Earth for the soul purpose of dying to atone for our sins. If you believe in that, your world will be changed. If you believe in that you should live in a way that reflects God's love for you onto others - the same love that was willing to have his own son die so that you might live.

In The Battle

     Ever feel like you just can't win? Like it's a never-ending battle and your on the losing side? I mean if we are all being honest we probably feel this way at some point. Let's be honest, life IS a battle but we are not on the losing side at all. We may have a few small defeats, but we have great victories!
     Have you ever read 2 Chronicles 20? I won't quote it all on here, but I recommend you read it when you get the chance. This is the story of how a vast army came to attack all of Judah under the rule of Jehoshaphat. "Alarmed, Jehoshaphat resolved to inquire of the Lord, and he proclaimed a fast for all of Judah. The people of Judah came together to seek help from the Lord; indeed they came from every town in Judah to seek him." 3-4. All of the people gathered in the temple and prayed to God. They petitioned to God and said "We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you." 12. Then the Lord answered through a prophet, "This is what the Lord says to you: do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's." 15. He told them to march down against them but they wouldn't have to fight. As they set out to the battle, Jehoshaphat said to them "Have faith in the Lord your God and you will be upheld; have faith in his prophets and you will be successful." 20. Men were appointed to go ahead of the army and sing praises to God, saying, "Give thanks to the Lord, for his love endures forever." 21.
     My friend, did you catch the significance of that? These men were headed into a battle against a vast army where they were greatly outnumbered and out skilled but rather than fret and worry they sing praises to God! Don't you want to live your life in this way? I know I do! They had true faith in God. True faith, which allowed them to praise God while marching toward an army that wanted to kill them. That is the faith that moves mountains. Well, long story short God set ambushes on the vast army and they all killed each other before God's people even arrived to the battle site.

For the word of the Lord is right and true;

he is faithful in all he does.

The Lord loves righteousness and justice; 

the earth is full of his unfailing love.

No king is saved by the size of his army;

no warrior escapes by his great strength.

A horse is a vain hope for deliverance; 

despite all its great strength it cannot save.

But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear him,

on those whose hope is in his unfailing love,

do deliver them from death

and keep them alive in famine.

We wait in hope for the Lord;

he is our help and our shield.

In him our hearts rejoice,

for we trust in his holy name.

May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord,

even as we put our hope in you.

Psalm 33: 4-5, 16-22

Photos of the Day:

 Here is the first set of photos from my new camera. These are my first photography attempt with it, and I took pictures of some of the remaining wreckage in Galveston.

These are a few shots from a bluebonnet outing in Chappell Hill, TX.

A few flags on a windy day in Houston.

UTMB in Galveston has a wonderful garden this time of year where I took the remainder of the pictures. (Sometimes you have to get past the thorns to see the beauty hidden within.)

Busy, busy bee

     It's funny how life seems to ebb and flow just as the tides of the mighty oceans. Even with a job that has steady unchanging hours somehow I find myself in slow periods with plenty of extra time, or like now a time of zero free time and way too much to do. Well that might be a bit of an exaggeration, I don't think I ever actually have "plenty of extra time," but you know what I mean. So in the spirit of not having much extra time lately, I also will not take up too much of yours. On a bittersweet sweet note, this will be the last blog with pictures taken on my old camera because (drum roll please) I got a brand spanking new beauty (Nikon D5100) and am quite excited to capture the world with a new sense of wonder and joy (or just through a new lens)! So without further delay, here are the last photos I wanted to share with the world taken from my newly retired camera.

Photos of the Day:

 I've been playing with the idea of reflections, and I love the way that the beauty of nature is held in a piece of technology here. I was actually working on my bible study sitting on the back porch when I glanced at my phone and noticed how beautiful the sky looked behind me. Little moments.

Quote of the Day:

"Do not pay attention to every word people say, or you may hear your servant cursing you - for you know in your heart that many times you yourself have cursed others." Ecclesiastes 7:21-22

I like this quote for the two simple messages I believe it conveys, first that what other people say is not what matters. Second, don't be hypocritical, it is easier to point out the speck in another person's eye than to realize there's one in yours. Be forgiving when someone does or says something hurtful and remember that you have done hurtful things too and it is not your place to judge others.

Exercise Note of the Day:

On Saturday I ran a Mighty Mudder Dash - a 5k run with obstacle courses, and it's all through mud. I had so much fun and it got me back into the swing of things! I absolutely cannot wait to do more.

Brazos Bend

     Camping. Not something I do very often, but when I do I prefer it to involve running water and an air mattress. So my friends and I went on a little camping trip this past weekend to Brazos Bend State Park. It didn't exactly live up to my preferences, but we did have running water!
     I had such a blast, I arrived late Friday afternoon (some had been there a while already and some arrived after me) and we immediately took off on a short hike. This short hike ended up being probably my favorite of the weekend, and definitely the most exquisite. While we were hiking around one of the large lakes in the park the sunset began, and the colors painted across the sky were vibrant and beautiful, and their reflection in the lake was just as amazing. Plus on this hike I saw my first ever alligator in the wild! It was in the water with just the top of his head sticking out, but I saw him nonetheless.
     After the hike we returned to our campsite to cook and eat hamburgers and hotdogs. Then we sang worship songs and had a time of prayer, after which we enjoyed s'mores and hot chocolate. Naturally a chubby bunny competition ensued - for those unfamiliar with the game of chubby bunny it is a challenge to fit as many marshmallows in your mouth as possible while still being able to clearly say "chubby bunny" - the funnier part of this however was when the park ranger stopped by to remind us it was quiet time. The two gentlemen doing chubby bunny had about 9 marshmallows in each of their mouths, and everyone was trying so hard not to laugh. The winner made it to 12 (after the ranger left of course).
     Later in the evening we took a night hike, it was a lot of fun to walk around the trails without lights, the moon was surprisingly bright. We even saw an owl spying on us from a branch over the path. We got back to our tents around 1am and were all fast asleep. My friend Faith and I woke up at 6:30 and went back to the big lake to hike around while the sun rose. Unfortunately it was quite cloudy that morning so not near as pretty as the sunset had been the night before.
     Upon our return we made and ate a delicious breakfast - funny how all food tastes better when you're starving at a campsite - of breakfast tacos. In all seriousness though the food was great because it was all prepared by my friend Daniel who left the following Monday for his new job as head chef at a camp in Colorado. Then we cleaned up and played card games until time to leave.

Here are a few pictures from the trip, 

some are more like photography, but some are just for fun.

Sunset Hike:

CHUBBY BUNNY!

Night Hike:

Sunrise Hike:

 

Group Shots:

 

 Quote of the Day:

"Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, let your mind dwell on these things."               Philippians 4:8

Lets face it, our minds are prone to wander from all that is holy, but when we do, recall this verse. We are called to dwell on excellent and praiseworthy things - the things of our most high God.

Exercise Note of the Day:

 After an MRI it was determined that I have an inflamed tendon in my ankle which is causing all of the pain while I run. I am on two weeks of doctors ordered rest, then I will attempt to resume training. Praising God that is wasn't anything serious!