Sharing Time

So, I've never been particularly good at sharing. Well, that's not true, I am very good at sharing things that are easy to share, but when it comes to the deeper things I'd rather just leave them be. After reading my good friend's blog where she catalogs her life and is incredibly translucent about her medical conditions I have decided to share what has been going on in my life recently.

Recently might not be the best term either considering I've had this on and off since I was 17 but it's currently "on" so it is current in that sense. Since February I have been having chest pain, it's a fairly normal occurrence for me so I've never been particularly concerned, but I decided to try seeing a doctor again since I gave up on them previously (2006 and 2008). These 'episodes' as I like to call them vary in length and can be anywhere from 30 seconds to 90 minutes. The pain is fairly intense and has on occasion left me feeling rather crippled. In my previous times seeing doctors they have run batteries of tests with no solid results. I to this day have no solid explanation for what happens to me. The main problem being that none of them have been able to induce or record an episode - which means they have no idea what's happening when I'm actually having one, all they can see is how my body is acting normally.

The latest doctor did an EKG, chest ex-ray, chest echo, and finally (last Tuesday) a stress test. Still nothing. In the midst of the disappointment of having no results I am at least happy that they are so far unable to detect any serious defects with my heart or lungs. I've heard many opinions: angina, anxiety, arrhythmia, pleurisy, etc. And I'm just about to my giving up on the doctors point once again. Unfortunately they seem to have been increasing in intensity, frequency, and length so I'm not sure if giving up and living with it is currently a proper option.

That's the gist of it.

With that being said I know that God is faithful, and that He works all things for the good of those who love Him, I know that I can trust Him above all things, and I know that whatever happens is for the good of His kingdom. I serve the great, mighty, all-powerful God and He loves little old me, faults and all. That is what is truly amazing.

My favorite verse at the moment, which I have nearly memorized just from my shear desire to share it with the world is:
"I am God, and there is no other; I am God and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done, saying, 'My counsel shall stand, and I will accomplish all my purpose.'" Isaiah 46:9-10
How can anyone question the sovereignty of God after reading those words? I most certainly cannot.

The adorable twins I nanny for turned 1 last Thursday! Oh, and I learned the greatest lesson in child photography - JUST KEEP CLICKING!

Garden My Heart

     I have a dream. It may not be as inspirational and amazing as Mr. King's, but it is a dream nonetheless. My dream is to have this amazing (and useful) garden. I'm not one of those people who just wants tons and tons of pretty flowers, I want all of my fruits, veggies, and herbs. Don't get me wrong, I like flowers in their place: such as lining a walk or framing an entryway, but my dream garden (so far in my mind) doesn't have any.
     Imagine walking down the road and lining the fence next to you are marvelously enticing fruit trees of every kind: apple, pear, pomegranate, fig, peach, plum, lemon, mango, orange (I could keep listing but you might get bored). These trees are big, full, and heavy laden with their sweet offerings. So you decide to turn down the driveway to see more and you notice that what you couldn't see from outside is that under the large fruit trees by the fence there are also bushes (blueberry, blackberry, strawberry) likewise possessing copious amounts of their wares. You also find that the drive is lined by trellises overgrown by grapes so big and juicy you wonder how they are hanging on to the vine. Back behind the house (just outside the kitchen door) is the garden containing every aromatic herb you could imagine, in carefully sectioned plots. At the end of the herbs you reach the vegetable (and other planted fruits) garden with lettuces, green beans, watermelon, cucumber, squashes, zucchini and onions, etc. Plus throughout the yard are scattered almond and pecan trees already covering the ground in their tasty nuts.
     Well, my dream might need some work, but that's the gist of it. This week I started my first ever trial run for my dream garden - I bought a Meyer lemon tree, a pomegranate tree and I planted some watermelon seeds. I'm excited to see if my thumb is green like my dad's or brown like my mom's. Though to be fair to my mom she also recently purchased a few lemon trees, so we'll see how those turn out too.

To coincide with the theme of gardening I thought I would share the parable of the sower:
     "A farmer went out to sow his seed. As he was scattering the seed, some fell along the path, and the birds came and ate it up. Some fell on rocky places, where it did not have much soil. It sprang up quickly, because the soil was shallow. But when the sun came up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they had no root. Other seed fell among thorns, which grew up and choked the plants. Still other seed fell upon good soil, where it produced a crop - a hundred, sixty or thirty times what was sown."
      "Listen then to what the parable of the sower means: When anyone hears the message about the kingdom and does not understand it, the evil one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. This is the seed sown along the path. The one who received the seed that fell on rocky places is the man who hears the word and at once receives it with joy. But since he has no root, he lasts only a short time. When trouble or persecution comes because of the word, he quickly falls away. The one who received the seed that fell among the thorns is the man who hears the word, but the worries of this life and the deceitfulness of wealth choke it, making it unfruitful. But the one who received the seed that fell on good soil is the man who hears the word and understands it. He produces a crop, yielding a hundred, sixty, or thirty times what was sown."
Matthew 13:4-8, 18-23

We are the harvesters of plants, but God is the harvester of man. May he find the fruits of our lives a favorable offering for His kingdom.

Photos of the Day:

On an exercise note, I recently started running someone's dog (Indy) so my frequency and pace is beginning to pick up, plus my motivation for getting out of bed! My best time, which was Monday, is 34:50 for 3 miles. I'm hoping that as I continue running- three miles gets easier and easier and eventually I can pick up the miles and the pace, but for now I'm comfortable with what Indy drags out of me.

In The Battle

     Ever feel like you just can't win? Like it's a never-ending battle and your on the losing side? I mean if we are all being honest we probably feel this way at some point. Let's be honest, life IS a battle but we are not on the losing side at all. We may have a few small defeats, but we have great victories!
     Have you ever read 2 Chronicles 20? I won't quote it all on here, but I recommend you read it when you get the chance. This is the story of how a vast army came to attack all of Judah under the rule of Jehoshaphat. "Alarmed, Jehoshaphat resolved to inquire of the Lord, and he proclaimed a fast for all of Judah. The people of Judah came together to seek help from the Lord; indeed they came from every town in Judah to seek him." 3-4. All of the people gathered in the temple and prayed to God. They petitioned to God and said "We do not know what to do, but our eyes are upon you." 12. Then the Lord answered through a prophet, "This is what the Lord says to you: do not be afraid or discouraged because of this vast army. For the battle is not yours, but God's." 15. He told them to march down against them but they wouldn't have to fight. As they set out to the battle, Jehoshaphat said to them "Have faith in the Lord your God and you will be upheld; have faith in his prophets and you will be successful." 20. Men were appointed to go ahead of the army and sing praises to God, saying, "Give thanks to the Lord, for his love endures forever." 21.
     My friend, did you catch the significance of that? These men were headed into a battle against a vast army where they were greatly outnumbered and out skilled but rather than fret and worry they sing praises to God! Don't you want to live your life in this way? I know I do! They had true faith in God. True faith, which allowed them to praise God while marching toward an army that wanted to kill them. That is the faith that moves mountains. Well, long story short God set ambushes on the vast army and they all killed each other before God's people even arrived to the battle site.

For the word of the Lord is right and true;

he is faithful in all he does.

The Lord loves righteousness and justice; 

the earth is full of his unfailing love.

No king is saved by the size of his army;

no warrior escapes by his great strength.

A horse is a vain hope for deliverance; 

despite all its great strength it cannot save.

But the eyes of the Lord are on those who fear him,

on those whose hope is in his unfailing love,

do deliver them from death

and keep them alive in famine.

We wait in hope for the Lord;

he is our help and our shield.

In him our hearts rejoice,

for we trust in his holy name.

May your unfailing love rest upon us, O Lord,

even as we put our hope in you.

Psalm 33: 4-5, 16-22

Photos of the Day:

 Here is the first set of photos from my new camera. These are my first photography attempt with it, and I took pictures of some of the remaining wreckage in Galveston.

These are a few shots from a bluebonnet outing in Chappell Hill, TX.

A few flags on a windy day in Houston.

UTMB in Galveston has a wonderful garden this time of year where I took the remainder of the pictures. (Sometimes you have to get past the thorns to see the beauty hidden within.)